We witness a miracle each time a child enters a life
But those who must make their journey home across time and miles,
Growing in the hearts of those waiting to love them,
Are carried on the wings of destiny
And placed among us by God's own hands.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Fight Is On!!

On Monday morning (8/21) I woke up and went downstairs to find my husband sitting at the computer with watery eyes.  We heard something from the Embassy.  My husband said, "Well, you'll be lucky if you can go get him in September, or even October."  Not good.

The embassy was not satisfied with the interview being the end of it.  Now they want three more documents.  Ridiculous, crazy, virtually unobtainable requests. I proceeded to begin crying, yelling, and cursing at the fact that this has been such a long, horrible journey.  Why us?  I took the day off work and was glad I did as I really didn't stop crying until 2:00.  I did a few constructive things that day such as writing a letter to the embassy in response to their requests per the advice of my agency.  I had gathered information about our local congressman who may be able to help us as others had also received help from theirs.  And I waited.

Tuesday when I woke up I was in a fighting mood.  The tears were gone and the boxing gloves came out.  I sent an email to an advocacy group that helps families dealing with embassy issues related to adoption.  I also called the congressman's office to at least get that ball rolling and let them know we may need their help.  And I waited.

When I woke up Wednesday, the response to my letter was there from the embassy.  It was what I expected.  Later that day while at work, my cell phone rang.  It was the congressman!  He listened as I briefly told him our situation and he replied that he would be happy to advocate for us.  He reminded me that he could not force anyone's hand but that he could work with the State Department and see if he could help.  YES!!!   Finally I felt as though someone could help us.  And I waited.

Today has been a good day.  It is actually the only day in this adoption process we have had several bits of good news at once.  We went to the congressman's office and talked to one of his staff.  We told him all the details of our case, including the struggles.  He understood the demands of the embassy just don't apply to our case.  He is going to contact them today and hopefully begin to move mountains.  I received an e-mail from the advocacy group and they want to talk to me on Monday.  I also received an email from the director of our agecny in Ethiopia and they are putting several things into motion.  They are also considering our case a high priority. 

Should I allow myself to feel hopeful?  Should I allow myself to relax, even for a second, and breathe a sigh of relief?  Not yet.  But for once I feel as though someone is on our side.  I will continue to fight until the end and our son is home with us.  And I will continue to wait.

"Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for your God will be with you wherever you go."  Josh 1:9


Sunday, August 21, 2011

Not Waiting Alone

So it is Sunday and we continue to wait for news from the Embassy.  We did get confirmation that the guardian interview took place on Wednesday but we have yet to hear word from the Embassy.  Did it go well?  Did they get the information they wanted?  Will we clear this week?  We are hoping "Yes" to these questions in the next few days.

As we have been waiting, I have met many others who are in the same situation we are.  Others who have their hands tied and hearts broken waiting on news they can go bring their children home.  Others who have also watched their children grow from infants to near toddlers in pictures and videos.  Trust me, this is a devastating and terrible thing to go through and I would not wish it on anyone; but it also helps to know we are not alone.

I have made many friends on Facebook only by being in this process and having that commonality.  I do not know where these people live, nor what they do for a living, nor have I ever personally met them.  But I feel their pain and their joy.  They have been a source of strength and comfort for me.

Much of my strength has been given to me in words.  Words shared from others hearts because their journeys have also been long and tiring.  One of these women is a friend of a friend on Facebook and her name is Jen Hatmaker.  She too had an incredibly long fight to bring her son home.  The following words she wrote brought tears to my eyes:


   "When God said he wasn't done yet, he just wasn't done yet. He wasn't speaking in code. It wasn't a trick. The story was still in the middle, but I wanted to flip ahead to the end, past the conflict and struggle and straight to the happy ending. As Keeper of the Story, God knew the whole plot.

God doesn't promise us a clean middle part of the story. He never said we wouldn't encounter antagonists and drama and surprise twists and heartbreak. We weren't assured a G-rated plot where good feelings are peddled and no one dies or leaves or fails or waits. God promised things like healing and restoration and redemption. Which implies there will be injuries and broken relationships and losses. When he speaks of beauty from ashes, he seems to know there will be actual ashes to resurrect beauty from.

If you are confused right now, if your story isn't going the way you thought, or if you're tangled up in the messy middle where hope is deferred, dear reader, it could just be that God isn't done yet. Your story is not finished. Every hero and heroine must wade through the conflict to get to the end, and you can trust God because he is good. If you have nothing else to cling to, remember this: God is good. He loves goodness and justice. He heals and redeems. He is on the side of love and beauty. He is for you. He is never against you. You may be against you, other people may be against you, but God is not against you.

It is okay to be confused; I'm afraid that is our lot as finite creatures dealing with an infinite God. Some of God's best heros were confused in their subplots. But I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on. Because God is good and he is for goodness. "

And then there is my friend Jana Henessey who quoted a friend of hers on her blog page regarding her sadness over missing so many moments with her daughter:  "HE did not choose me for those moments.  HE chose me for these.  So I am choosing joy.  And I know that the moments in (Gabby's) life that God did choose me for are coming."

So, we all go on waiting, giving words of encouragement to each other knowing in the end we will eventually reach our goal.  And we will not have reached it alone.



Saturday, August 13, 2011

I'll Find A Way

We heard back from the embassy yesterday as the document they requested was submitted the day before.  Let me say it was not how I wanted to start my morning.  They have now requested an interview with his guardian.  I cried most of the morning as I believed this was the same person one of the social workers involved in our case looked for and could not find--after looking for over two weeks!  If this person cannot be found then it is highly likely the embassy will do a full investigation which could take two weeks up to two months or more!  Well, later in the day we received another e-mail which stated that our agency requested an interview appointment for this person for either Monday or Wednesday of this coming week.  Dare I assume that this means they do know who this person is and where to locate her to get her to this appointment?

Now we hope that her answers to their questions are what they want to hear.

This request is not a new one.  The embassy has been interviewing birth parents and guardians more and more frequently to determine that the child is a "true orphan".  Some of these interviews have been quite traumatic I am told.  How would you like to be a birth mother who has given up her child and you are questioned by the US government about every aspect of how the child came to be, why you can't support them, the state of your health, etc?  The hardest part of this is that WE know he is an orphan.  His mother has disappeared, his father is unknown, and he has been sitting in an orphanage for over a year now.  No one has come to reclaim him and the birth mother had three opportunities to appear in court and stop this.  What part of his situation does not fit the definition of an orphan?

So, sadly we wait some more not knowing what will happen or even having a timeline.  The embassy has decided to not schedule appointments from August 25-September 5 so if we do not clear on Monday chances are he will not be home until September.  Even if we do clear Monday or Wednesday we would be lucky to get an appointment before the 25th.  Once again, timing is not on our side.

I found these words on another adoptive parents blog that are from a song titled "Amos' Story" by Aaron Ivey.  I thought they were appropriate about now.

    "I'll find a way to get you here
     If it takes my fleeting breath
     Another sunrise hits the ground
     And it's a dark lonely sight
     Lightyears away I hope you know
     There is somebody searching
      For the way to get you here
      I will get you here."
     

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

On Embassy Road

Well, we were finally submitted to the embassy on 7/20/11 after two false starts.  The agency apparently wanted to get additional information regarding something they found in his paperwork and had a hard time getting it.  Yesterday we received notice from the embassy that they need more information.  That was not the Monday morning wake-up call I wanted.

The embassy wants information on who Amanuel's guardian is/was over in Ethiopia.  They questioned a name in his file that we have never heard of and want court documents related to guardianship.  I just don't understand why this is important at this point.  His biological parents cannot be found and we have already passed court with OUR names on the adoption decree and his birth certificate.  WE are his parents!  Why does this process need to be drug out any longer?

Anyway, I am keeping close contact with those involved in getting this resolved and pushing for a quick solution.  I AM TIRED OF WAITING.  I have also changed my plans to travel to the last week of August as this way I will not miss the girls first day of school or the concert we have tickets to.  Of course, if we get the okay to travel sooner you bet I will be on that plane in a heartbeat!

And for those that don't remember, here is the latest picture of what I am fighting for---my son!


Nathan and His Favorite Friend